Martin Short Turns Ed Sheeran Into a Conan Punchline

Martin Short told Conan O’Brien he looked like “Ed Sheeran in a fun-house mirror”—and Conan couldn’t be clearer about his appetite for Short’s insults. This is a roast with a very satisfied customer.

The comparison came during Short’s appearance on Conan O’Brien Needs a Friend, posted October 19, according to Billboard. Recalling a dinner with O’Brien, Short also offered this delicate portrait: “You look like a Q-tip with ketchup on it.” Sheeran supplies the recognisable likeness; Conan gets the distortion.

There’s some history behind that likeness. Sheeran appeared on O’Brien’s podcast in 2023, when the pair discussed how other children treated them as redheads, Billboard reports. That gives the comparison context—not evidence that Sheeran has endorsed it or responded.

Conan’s position, however, requires no interpretation. Entertainment Weekly reports that he recalled a fan trying to defend him after an earlier Short roasting. His answer to the idea that he needed protection: “What are you talking about? This is me in heaven.” He added, “I love Marty Short. I’m so happy when you go after me. It just fills me with joy.”

That’s the distinction worth keeping: Conan’s delight belongs to Conan, not automatically to everyone named in the joke. Short has borrowed Sheeran’s likeness to insult a willing comedy partner. No rescue mission needed for the man in the mirror.